I have become a creature of faith.
In this ongoing lesson that is the separation from my beloved wife, I am finding that the only thing that is keeping me from going completely mad is faith, trust, and belief.Faith in the love that drew us together in the first place.
Belief in the process we are each of us undergoing, in different ways, that must happen if we are to have a chance at a future together.
Trust in my wife, that she knows what she is doing, and that she won't break my heart in the long run.
Yesterday, I put a deposit down on her wedding band, to go with the engagement ring my mother gave me for her.
Her Winter Solstice present this year will be new kitchen cabinetry; my wife is a kitchen witch by preference, and some of her best magic happens there. So, new cabinets, crafted and desinged by moi, to be ready before I go for surgery in early December.
Surgery in early December??? Yup, I am having my vasectomy reversed, because she & I will make amazing parents, and we both want this badly.
After that, in early January I will be booking the venue for our wedding and paying the deposit on that, in addition to continuing with the plans and preparations for the ceremony. And on and on....
I am proceeding according to the assumption that she will be back, we will complete this process successfully, and we shall go on with our life together and fulfill the promise we made. I cannot continue under any other. If I were to assume otherwise, life simply wouldn't be worth living. I will not rush her, nor make a problem for her, nor stalk her or call her endlessly or any other damnfool thing. I will be patient and I will wait until she gives me something to suggest another course of action.
You see, I have faith.
I trust.
And, I believe.
Trust in my wife, that she knows what she is doing, and that she won't break my heart in the long run.
Yesterday, I put a deposit down on her wedding band, to go with the engagement ring my mother gave me for her.
Her Winter Solstice present this year will be new kitchen cabinetry; my wife is a kitchen witch by preference, and some of her best magic happens there. So, new cabinets, crafted and desinged by moi, to be ready before I go for surgery in early December.
Surgery in early December??? Yup, I am having my vasectomy reversed, because she & I will make amazing parents, and we both want this badly.
After that, in early January I will be booking the venue for our wedding and paying the deposit on that, in addition to continuing with the plans and preparations for the ceremony. And on and on....
I am proceeding according to the assumption that she will be back, we will complete this process successfully, and we shall go on with our life together and fulfill the promise we made. I cannot continue under any other. If I were to assume otherwise, life simply wouldn't be worth living. I will not rush her, nor make a problem for her, nor stalk her or call her endlessly or any other damnfool thing. I will be patient and I will wait until she gives me something to suggest another course of action.
You see, I have faith.
I trust.
And, I believe.
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